I would have loved to have become a hermit. I would never have had to have worked so hard--I could basically just do all the ‘fun” things I wanted for myself. It’s a selfish way of thinking –depriving humankind of their "greatest resource, both natural and man-made” i.e. me— but the thing keeping me from turning my back on the world are the great people I have in my life, that make me feel special. BRB
… Okay, I just threw up because of too much sweetness on the page, I was trying to be nice and give people some sorta “shout-out” for my recent birthday, but I don’t want to try it again in case I die. So the reason I won’t become a hermit is because I like watching old people. Yeah, that’s what I meant to write. My favourite old people are the type that dress like they're tweenaged sluts. Have you seen any episode of Sex and the City? Those are the people I’m talking about. (Hint: her name starts with an "S" and ends in "amantha")
This reminds me I just discovered a funny Chinese-speaking, Sex and the City-inspired documentary show set in Beijing. It’s called Sexy Beijing and it's really quite interesting. The host is a Jewish American lady with, I’m assuming, perfect Mandarin (she has an accent, but she seems to be able to talk to everyone quite well). It has many things I find “cool” in the world, something that reminds me of old people dressing as if they’re in that awkward period on the border of illegal/legal-age where girls just slut it up to 'discover' themselves, hardcore azns, and most importantly, I think, the mix of English slang with Mandarin. I.e. “ni you ji ge bitches ji ge hoes ma?”
Click here for the GOLD.
p.s. my birthday was cool, thanks to everyone for surviving their birth journeys to be there with me on my special day. You all deserve party hats.