Thursday, April 30, 2009

The QUEST

I put "quest" all in capitals so that you would assume it's important, big, EPIKKKKKKKKKK--it's not  ...    I just want to find a new ringtone. I'm tossing up for something cheesy and old i.e. delicious(tbh I don't really understand gourmet cheese because I am poor and not-white, therefore cheese is used to portray me as being po--OMFG F YOU Jane Eyre**)

So far my shortlist contains
Captain and Tenille - Love will keep us together
Bonnie Tyler - Total eclipse of the heart
Elton John & Kiki Dee - Don't go breaking my heart
Color me Badd - Sex you up 

My ringtone right now is the pwnzorz (pokemon battle music) but every now and again I feel embarrassed about my phone ringing, or getting text messages (but mostly text messages, lol ["Gee gee gee gee gee gee gee gee gee". Repeat] is my current text ringtone). There's only one problem and every person who is too cool to be understood by commonfolk might assume that I'm trying to be ironic by having one of those songs as my play list, which is like the de facto defence if quizzed about it by a stranger I.e. "haha no uh I'm being like fully ironic and stuff, dude, which is funny! I'm so witty, I only ever like to wear skinny jeans, hip print-tees featuring naked girls/french that I don't understand/famous people being ironic/general irony, black thick-rimmed glasses and--and LOVE ME!"
So I guess I just don't want people to see me as someone who craves attention [I re-worded it to get rid of "attention-seeker", for some reason that word just annoys me because it reminds me of old lady teachers yelling]. Although I am xD

**My gripe is not really with Jane Eyre, or the story, but moreso the systematic institutionalisation of the text into the required reading scheme of *researches, and by 'research' I mean 'make something up'* EVERY PERSON BORN/STUDYING IN THE WESTERN WORLD/ENGLISH.   

Oh yeah, the day of my oral was the same day as Mylinh's birthday, and she used her birthday wish magic to wish me good luck ^ ^
+ Quest Crew won america's best dance crew, so yaaaayyyyyy    

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

adrenaline rush

I don't know why but giving oral gives me a great surge of excitement--a rush of blood to the head, if you will. When there is that great ejaculation of spontaneous release you feel nervous, relieved, excited, and I'm talking about the IB English IOC, obviously ... but I wasn't *giggle giggle* IOC = Internal Oral Commentary

So it was the day before my big important IOC, and I hadn't read all of the Poe stories we could've been assessed on. Yeah, I know what you're thinking I'm "slack", "lazy" and "has really silky smooth hands", and in my defence I have this to say, "uh, yes, okay. agreed." Last night I wasn't able to sleep because I felt that I wouldn't be able to wake up in time for school unless I stayed up the entire night (I know that lacks ummmm reasonable logic, but, like the narrator from The Tell-Tale Heart, the disease/lack of sleep increased my abilities). Having started reading all of the Poe stories at around 1, I managed to finish reading and working out my main ideas on each text before 5. I probably should've started earlier but I have a timetable where I have "free-time" until 6PM lol because I'm cool and generous to myself--then after free time I fell asleep, then woke up and had to watch Gossip Girl. I know there were other extracts not written by Poe that I could've been assessed on, but I was secretly really hoping I didn't get Much ado about nothing, and it turns out that I have strong wishpower (not recommended for everyone), although I did look over the story to some extent. What I really didn't want in the IOC were three poems by Bruce Dawe--"A Victorian Hangman Sends His Love", "Burial Ceremony", and "Butterworth Road". Mostly because I hadn't studied any of them extensively and the Poe texts were still fresh in my mind. I ended up getting Butterworth Road, and I know a lot of people would be thinking "wtf Musu is a douche. Butterworth Road is easy. It is like the easiest of easy things out of all the easiest things to ever do (besides your mum). Reh reh reh". This is why I'm usually careful never to display any kind of expertise in anything, in case it makes other people feel bad, because usually when people do it around me, I end up feeling bad. I know its probably perceived to be easier, but everyone is an individual [except for people + their doppelgangers lol] and most people are mostly capable of independent thought or having their own opinion. Overall, I think it went okay, but I did have a few major lapses in consistent speech :S It was exciting though n_n and now I can finally sleep.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Sexy Beijing is FTW

I would have loved to have become a hermit. I would never have had to have worked so hard--I could basically just do all the ‘fun” things I wanted for myself. It’s a selfish way of thinking –depriving humankind of their "greatest resource, both natural and man-made” i.e. me— but the thing keeping me from turning my back on the world are the great people I have in my life, that make me feel special. BRB

… Okay, I just threw up because of too much sweetness on the page, I was trying to be nice and give people some sorta “shout-out” for my recent birthday, but I don’t want to try it again in case I die. So the reason I won’t become a hermit is because I like watching old people. Yeah, that’s what I meant to write. My favourite old people are the type that dress like they're tweenaged sluts. Have you seen any episode of Sex and the City? Those are the people I’m talking about. (Hint: her name starts with an "S" and ends in "amantha")

This reminds me I just discovered a funny Chinese-speaking, Sex and the City-inspired documentary show set in Beijing. It’s called
Sexy Beijing and it's really quite interesting. The host is a Jewish American lady with, I’m assuming, perfect Mandarin (she has an accent, but she seems to be able to talk to everyone quite well). It has many things I find “cool” in the world, something that reminds me of old people dressing as if they’re in that awkward period on the border of illegal/legal-age where girls just slut it up to 'discover' themselves, hardcore azns, and most importantly, I think, the mix of English slang with Mandarin. I.e. “ni you ji ge bitches ji ge hoes ma?” 

Click here for the GOLD.

p.s. my birthday was cool, thanks to everyone for surviving their birth journeys to be there with me on my special day. You all deserve party hats.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Smoking pipes, Law & Order, dreaming that Lady Gaga is in need of a Lord

Sometimes I'm not sure why some things are so interesting, but I just know that they are. The other night at maccas I saw this man smoking a pipe and in my head I thought, "holy shit what a straight-up G". It's like the ultimate coolness of smoking a pipe overrides the destructiveness of what he is doing to himself. Relate this statement to Lady Gaga. ( 8 points)

The other night I was stuck in some apartment room with nothing to do so I decided to watch tv, because if I hadn't have left the house this is what I would resort to in moments of boredom. It was around ten that night and there was some marathon of Law & Order, and I began to wonder how many freaking law & orders there were. There's SVU and and and well that's the only one I know the name of but it seems like there's heaps of them. I always get kinda confused when I'm reading a tv guide and it just says the title. I know them as "the with zac from saved by the bell" and "the one with marishka hargitay"--whose named I only remember because it makes me think of female Hungarian bodybuilders. I don't know how it happened so that there are now so many incarnations of the show, but I guess I don't mind because many awesomes is greater than one singular awesome. 

I think Lawrence will be upset with this but I have to admit that I really really really love Lady Gaga, and Britney Spears' new music is so catchy and I am very easily entertained. She's the kind of artist that I would like if she wasn't so mainstream but she just happens to be so very mainstream. Besides her lyrics being at times somewhat inane, repetitively sexual to the point of explosion, and her get-up being so post modern that it transcends the guidelines of what it is the avant-garde and yet still relevant. (wait, wtf?) Just saying she's cool, and even if her image is highly over-sexed, I interpret it as being severe camp. Spacey, avant-garde, alien-tramp oversexed camp, but camp nonetheless. I don't always understand lyrics in songs anyway, sometimes the words are so unrecognisable that it has me questioning my English comprehension, but I know that if I feel the music in my soul (lol?) that I will probably enjoy it. 


... just kidding, I don't have a soul


So on other days when I'm soullessly wandering through life I like to go on the internet and look at nice things, but lately this vapid depreciation of my time has left me feeling like my time is fruitless. On and unrelated note I have a theory about time being represented as a living thing in Macbeth (there's a quite about time ... seeds blah) , lulz, but it's a massive compartmentalisation of a particular extract, which I tend to dabble in extensively (ooh yeah I just used a paradox, for what purpose am I--the author using this paradox for?       ...   I'll be fucked if I know). 

Thus completes the required pensive-flavoured part of this post. Stay tuned for future fluctuations in my errrhm unstable emotional economy(? =teenagers being sookey) Rofl, I thought that was funny xD

Oh yeah school starts soon which means we have our English IOCs very soon. I like Macbeth, well not as a person because he's a dick, but I don't think I would be able to perform as well using a text from Macbeth than Much ado about nothing. I attribute this to the fact that Macbeth makes me feel like a big fat helping of emo. "This extract relates to destructive personality ... omg everyone ... they all died .... :| ", and I don't really need to have a pussy-out during my oral, because my teacher told me that he was going to check out my last IB oral from last year, and downgrade it. I should be upset but the whole time I was thinking, "uhhhm they must've marked me too easily," and I guess I was, ultimately, right. Which is not a satisfying conclusion but I guess it does make me feel better about being right all the time. I wouldn't call it a silver lining but more of a lining made of a semi-precious stone, or possibly even just a worthless rhinestone. 

     

Thursday, April 16, 2009

"Life As We Know It" ... So I guess I do like anything

I'm closing in on the last three episodes of Life As We Know It, which if you don't know, is a tv show that aired in america and got cancelled only thirteen episodes in (thank you, source of all information--Wikipedia). Seriously though the show is so good because it is bad and I like anything. In a way the horrible overacting (which I believe to be a director's choice--"Dino feels angry. Give me more angry, growl at me, bash your cymbals, monkey-boy, etc"), the cliche storylines, and the somewhat-insulting dialogue (seriously sometimes they say lines that are a combination of cheesey, unbelievable and otherwise.) It's almost like the writers were told to paint a portrait of each character using only one colour--these colours being "hormonal" and "teenage angst". I like to think I'm a little more complex than, "Jackie looked at another boy, we r broken up but still grrrrrrrrr. ROAR I R has hormones, I consider any girl who is not Kelly Osborne to be hot, when really most of the "hot girls" I see are mostly un-hot, and closer to 'homely'. *eats dinosaur*" The unrealistic nature of the show is, essentially, what I'm drawn to. I like how the guys--who look older than me, but are supposed to play characters my age and younger, get so excited when a brother hooks up. I find this weird because sex is becoming less a rite of passage and more a thing that you sorta just do. Oh, and because they are supposed to not be giggly preschoolers, but okay whatever tell me how "teen life" should be. 

Like what Tyra said today, "Two abortions? You don't even treat it like it means anything. It's just like you're saying 'yesterday, I had a ham sandwich and an egg sandwich' and it means nothing to you". The episode was about teenaged girls who were pregnant/wanting to get pregnant (I have no idea why), some of the pregnant girls were twelve/thirteen, and I guess it just made me jealous that they were getting some lol, but seriously if a twelve year old can get sex something is wrong with me. Tyra is pretty much the bomb, because even if you don't like her, her tv-presence is strong, and she is so often unintentionally funny.

The show reminds me somewhat of an asian drama because I find that the acting in those shows is always so so sooo overdone. E.g. "I am in the process of making a sandwich! YOOOOSHH!!! SANDWICHES!!!! I love sandwich. *backflips*". Thus, very entertaining and enjoyable. 

I think the time-freeze turn-to-face-camera break-the-fourth-wall give-audience-glimpse-into-the-inner-mind-of-an-average-teenager is possibly the best part. The show is so like a blueprint they got out of a "cliche-story" filing cabinet, at times it makes me wet.  


It has also taught me important stuff like telling that your true feelings will make you feel better, fat girls need love too, sluts won't give you boners because you will be in love with someone else.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

mmmm that surely tastes like surly

Wow I haven't turned on my computer since Thursday night I deserve a smacko. So Thursday was the final day of school and being the model-student I am I decided to make an appearance unlike many others. My tardy/away record is not good as it is, on a count of "I-suck", so I thought I would tough it out, and by "tough it out"--I mean attend school in the last week where a) nothing happens b) teachers mostly pretend that "something" is happening c) everyone else is away. 

My plans, however, were foiled by my arch nemesis, the Sandman. So he decided to get revenge by making me sleep in, and thus missing my 7 o'clock bus (damn you, Sandyyyyy!!!), but I decided I would not let him win, so after ... um dozing back to bed after waking up, and then finally getting ready I decided to go to school. I thought it would be okay because my mum was working so she wouldn't know ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR *the incorrect buzzer on game shows kinda noise* she was in the kitchen. So I had to use my full pro ninja hax skills to sneak out of the house with my mum inside, jump the fence and make it to school. I got out of the house, and ran until my street turned into another just in case mum could feel it in her motherly senses that I was in the house. In my head I was all "oh yeah you the man ... you're so G ... lock me up in a cage tonight and plunder my dungeon etc etc" as I galavanted (I've always wanted to use that word *tear*) toward my bus stop. I decided to be adventurous and forego my closest bus stop for one closer to the petrol station so I could buy breakfast. On the way my dad drove past me on his way home though, and he stopped the car and I stood there staring at him for about three seconds hoping that in the three seconds I would learn some Jedi mind trick (uh, it didn't work) and convince him it wasn't me. Funny thing with my dad is that he would probably never say anything about it to me. So he just drove him, and I ran to the bus stop hoping that he wouldn't tell mum--the real enforcer. I ran the scenario through my head, "O M G they wouldn't kill me in public ... not with all this daylight, right??", but I panicked and even I grew doubtful of the tone my voice had assumed. The car then drove past me before I got to the bus stop and dropped me off to the bus.

Well that was the end of my little melodrama or so I thought, but when I signed in at the office one of the higher-ups grilled me for being late ... on a day when I could name at least ten people whose faces I hadn't seen all week. Ah, thank you God of Fairness for making life so fair. 

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

"oh wow, how non-descript!"

So last night I got home at around 6PM, and entered my completely dark, empty house. "Good, I can walk around nekkid," I thought (    ...    what? I only thought it). Yesterday was the school cross country which made for a surprisingly enjoyable day. Seeing as though it was cross country I was a little dirty and tired. I tried calling a bunch of people because I needed someone to keep me awake, but noone picked up their phones. I didn't even run/complete the actual course which makes me sound very unfit ... yeah, okay then. I was too tired to go shower so before I fell asleep I made my way to my sister's room to sleep in her bed, while I was home-alone, so that I wouldn't make my bed unclean. Yay for siblings! 

Fast forwarding a bit past the sleep I decided to expand my repertoire of Karaoke songs so I've been checking out some of Wang Li Hong's older "chinked out" rap songs. Heroes of Earth is pretty cool. Just thought it was worth mentioning because the upcoming holidays are only a week so it's not long enough to slack off and enjoy life ^ ^

Before I slept thought I browsed the net for a bit, and dad kept calling my name. I kept thinking I was getting in trouble because he would shout my name, I would go over to him, then he would tell me to turn on the tv or get his phone. The one thing he was actually yelling angrily at me was for leaving the buttons done up on a shirt that came back in the laundry. 

So what else is on my mind?
-Well break starts tomorrow, except it's only one week =/
So I don't think there'll be sufficient time to learn everything I need to know/revise, but I shouldn't let this stop me from trying

-My unseen english commentary
Even though I did poorly on the practice oral commentaries in class I don't feel too anxious about the real thing, but I will probably feel a lot worse the closer it gets. I wish I felt more scared about it now, get the fear out of the way. 

-getting serious about school
Well yeah Ib yeah year twelve yeah blah blah blah

-msn not working
Since msn is no longer working well, I guess I won't be going online as much ... which is good for my studying. Yay. 

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Thank you Disney for making me the person I am today

So I suspected that this person hated me, for no apparent reason, and I was getting worked up over it because I didn't know what I did wrong ... but then I realised it wasn't something I did they just errrhm don't like me : ) so I'm over it, I was able to overcome it by remembering an episode of RECESS xD

In the episode there's this kid who doesn't like TJ (for those of you not in the know with late 90's/early 00's cartoons, TEEJ is cool-incarnate, the bomb, he's a mack daddy, he's who you want to be friends with, who you would give your children to, the reason you want to be alive, etc). TJ is confuzzled because he is the man, right? So he tries with all his might to do all these nice things for the hater. I think he gets him into the cool secret places at school and a bunch of other really nice things in order to impress him so that he likes TJ. Then in the end, when the guy is asked why he doesn't like TJ he says something like "just coz" or something to that effect. Then TJ realises that he is the man, and that not everyone can like him. 
Ahhh Disney, the provider of my moral-nutrients. 

So besides getting really ":S" about that person I've continued watching if you are Leanne don't higlight this page n_n Boys Before Flowers because I am lame. It sorta reminds me of Gossip Girl, except really watered down for the sensibilities of good Confucian modest azn teenagers, and the westerners who watch it too.

I just watched Day Watch just now and it's surprisingly good. It's weird to find a sequel that is better than the first installment, but this movie shat in-and-around the mouth of Night Watch, which BTW disappointed me into a state of depression (seriously thought the preview made it look so awesome and then the movie was really crap and it was all in all a very boner inducing, and then boner-reducing experience). So the movie is good albeit confusing. It has some pretty cool action scenes, a lot of it is weird, but there's a lot of nice messages in there--sorta. My blog is usually just wall of text so I decided I should just a picture of Day Watch up here to cut all the boring black writing (alliteration used for emphasis OMG IOC english SOON D: )




Sunday, April 5, 2009

Sundays taste like ... not fitting in

I just had a talk with my beloved Mylinh about not fitting in to my own culture blah blah I am a pussy lol but it was nice n_n and I don't exactly like the idea of sacrificing who I am for the sake of fitting in so I guess I can endure the lonerrrrrrrrrness (not loneliness, because I don't feel "lonely" per say, but yeah whatever) I should stop juding people for being fake and saying that they're trying to be like *insert name of race*, because as much as I deny it I do the same thing. o_o Even if I don't want to admit it, I mean isn't liking it enough to be considered trying to be more like an *insert race* person? What brought this about? Well I never really have anyone to talk/hang out with when I'm at church so most of the time I'll just be by myself which I'm okay with o_o because I don't fit in ... I guess I'm the "white sheep" lol get it ? hohoho

TOK-related subjects aside (hey let's do knowledge claim of people wanting to be something they're not ... it sounded better in my head, Geoff =/) I started watching Boys Over Flowers(the third, newly-Koreanised version of the show that has had more redos than ... my school's ex-year twelve IB candidates? Zing) the other night, and it really pissed me off with it's many whatthefudgeries. Seriously who tells people to bully a girl if you are a guy, that's very unmanly of any real man wanting to be a man cos you gotta walk like a man, talk like a man, walk like a man my so-o-o-on, ok I just like Heart and Souls. You should  just give them an apron and put them in the kicthen but you never ummm advise people in a way so they end up thinking sexually assaulting her is pretty g. On the list of "things not to do if you want to get the girl you like", this is up there with farting in her drink while she's in the bathroom, and pulling the old "penis in the popcorn box hole-cutout" trick. 

Seriously, what makes the guys so attractive? Besides Ji Hoo's pretty radical sweet do, and the fact that the other dude was in a show I like they have like little-to-no redeeming qualities. You're probably sitting there at home thinking,"Shiz mangs, this foo'(me) be hardout sipping on the haterade atm". Well yeah? Oh okay. 

Turns back time.
On Saturday night I saw monsters vs aliens, after going to the planetarium for the Saturn show that was cancelled due to weather (btw does anyone else remember explaining "rain" as a God's tears or something else stupid when they were young? For me it was always Mary's tears, because Jesus is a man and therefore would not cry LOL). Going to the cinemas gave me an idea for a youtube video cept I r has no editing software to make it lol. We went to this pizza place afterwards, and these drunk Irishmen kept screaming "fuck" at everyone. How did I know they were Irish you ask? Well, they were drunk, said "fuck a lot" and he kept saying "fuck trenty mcguiness" to the other guy's face. Their accents, too. 

I know that sounds bad but hey guess what, Chris? It wasn't in Ipswich so stop making Ipswich sound like hell T_T I never really go to "Central Ipswich" or what I refer to as "IPSWICH-Ipswich" so yeah, it's not like Brisbane &Logan is so crash-hot all the time anyway, lol. 

Friday, April 3, 2009

Happy ending without the massage

Today was a fairly sweet day but it did have somewhat of a bitter/sour taste to it as well. I was very into my "not-going-out-anymore" stance until amanda seduced me with her saucy ways into going to eat dinner and going karaoke. 

: (

Needless to say, I am weak and only one man, and how could I resist?

So we ate at this korean restaurant (the newish madtongsan place upstairs next to koz n_n ) and the food was good. It was the same thing I usually get from there so I guess I was going to like it no matter what xD. amanda brought her friend Evan who is old and Chinese but cool and tall (like not just "tall-for-an-azn" tall, but like tall-tall, making me feel short next to him. He's pretty cool and he bought us booze because we are very very stressed lol. 

He also likes to model for shampoo commercials in China. Here is a picture of a spokesmodeling campaign from ... tonight? xD


Afterwards we went to karaoke and it was very enjoyable. On the train home not only did I discover that my ipod earphones were broken but also that these girls asked me if I wanted to go to a party ... but it was in Ipswich and I want my kidneys so I respectfully declined. I was so scared I would have to walk home in the freaking rain but I called my brother and he is very leet and uber cool and he picked me up. WOOT. happy ending 

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dear windows live messenger latest install,

I didn't want to be the "one" to say it but serioulsy WTFFFFF? I can deal with the updates but are the updates really "updates" at all? 

Lately you've been pissing me off fudgeloads, and I really really miss using tabs. Tabs were probably the best part of my msn experience and if I had to complete a survey on MSN plus functions I definitely would've picked tabs but only because I'm a really really popular person with many msn contacts wanting to get at me all at once. 

anyway I just hope we can be bros one day like we used to.

Peace out, g. 


So now that that's done with what else has been happening.
Oh yeah-nothing.

*computer crashes*
ahh so my computer wasn't working and in this shituation (haha shit + situation GET IT???? like Enyd Blyton inventing "chortle" portmanteau FTW niggahhh). So I did what any sensible computer noob does and promptly pressed what can be referred to as the "holy trinity of keys from Computer-fixing For Dummies"--CTRL + ALT + DEL. I also screamed a bit and ran to the tv to find solace in the comforting warmth of the tv's shining light. Comfort was found in the form of Cold Case, and although it was an old episode--an episode I had seen, it was still a good one. I like Cold Case because the music is always so dope. It really brings me to the time-period of the murder. It makes me feel like I were poisoned in '75, and the sense of nostalgia is just a strong reminder of the power of music. Plus Lily has white hair ... just like Lili from Tekken. Coincidence? Yeah, if "coincidence" were spelt "C-O-N-S-P-I-R-A-C-Y", if you get my 意思? 

If you get what I mean please return it to my mailing address. 


My friend is venting his fight to me now and he stressed the importance of not making assumptions because the other guy kept making assumptions (that's how it seems to me :S). SO UNLESS YOU R IB PSYCH STUDENT & WOULD LIKE TO BASE A KEY CONCEPT ON AN ASSUMPTION DON'T DO IT LORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

peace