jobs

I just applied for some jobs but I don't think I will get them. It turns out no one likes a weak work ethic. :( I'm cut cos that was my selling point.

IB’s Impending doom & boganity

So in a matter of days I will commence the tests that determine my life's worth. Yay for IB. I'm not really stressed out, but that doesn't mean I'm prepared. The past week has involved some half-arsed studying and mostly waking up in the late afternoon. It's quite funny that now as I am coming towards the end of my days in mandatory education ("woot woot", "fuck yeah", etc.) that a lot of my primary school acquaintances (just knowing someone doesn't necessarily facilitate a "friendship") have decided to connect with me online, and I realize that--offence implied, that I went to a predominately bogan school. That sounds rude but yeah whatever because OMG I'm so elitist but seriously after perusing some of their online profiles I have surmised the following.

1. Ipswich is a hole—and from this that Ipswich is NOT the most livable city in QLD (It's some statistic they put in newspaper articles).
   
2. Education, although important, is often neglected.
   

So one of the guys from my primary school posted a facebook status that asked "Who is more happier? the rich man who has everything or the homeless man who has very little?" and comments that were along the lines of "the rich guy" were responded to with "yeah but the poor guy is happy, man". My first thoughts were, "uhh he's kidding *lols*" but then I quickly realized that he was not being sarcastic (I don't think he knows what sarcasm is), and then I realized that he probably doesn't know what poverty is. Maybe I was reading too literally into what he had written (a trait that I have tried to develop after many misleading questions on Chinese papers like "did he like the food?" correct answer: "no, but it was described to be delicious and exquisite") and felt he did not adequately provide a basis for his argument. Then I realized poor people are always happy, just like in musicals. Orphans, I hear, are among the happiest people in the world, right after corpses, and children caught up in Nazi regimes escaping to the alps (I like Sound of Music, okay which was actually rather happy but I digress).

I didn't comment because I'm too much of a smug asshole to be an actual asshole and say something and because I don't really know why this annoys me. It's not like I taught him English or anything. Maybe I'm so empathetic towards his failed English/lower order reasoning (I don't think it can be considered ''higher order'') teacher that I am embarrassed for them.

Since I am almost finished with high school I'm supposed to have my career trajectory mapped out, except that I'm unmotivated to do much searching, and that I don't think I can get paid for eating bread and reading blogs (In a perfect world … *sigh*). Such is the extent of my laziness that I've taken to doing things in the dark (uh, not like that). On another note I should probably stop doing this because a) I hate three teaspoons of coffee in my coffees b) I miss my draws/baskets when I am putting my clothes away and c) because hot water is *quoting Johnny's TOK presentation* "in fact, HOT".

best blog ever=pictures of food

*drools*

assumptions

I was running a little late this morning because I had misplaced my school pants (yeah I know wtf, right?) anyway so in my flurried state I took off my sliding wardrobe doors to make it easier to search through the mass of clothes it conceals on the ground. Now right after reading this you, the reader, are probably thinking WTF he probably lives in a sty and in response to this I say, "umm ... yes". I don't think I will ever be able to own my house without it becoming overrun with just useless junk, and clothes on the floor. So my brother came in my room before and was like, "what happened to your door?" to which I replied "I COULDN'T FIND MY PANTS GET OFF MY BACK".

haha I'm retarded.

the industry standards of intimacy, wanting someone--well anyone, and the impending destruction of our planet

So recently my friends and I have been discussing being single most probably because I got drunk at a party and had a massive spack about it but whatever let's not get into the details. It's probably premature of us to worry about being lonely and whatnot, but I've come to realise that I am not really sure how intimacy is supposed to work anyhow.

Whenever I watch a movie or anything and a couple are together and they whisper some sweet words into the other one's ear I'm always confused. The only things my mind can imagine the person whispering are like "fill my hole", "suck my wang" or "let's go pancake manor?". With that being said I never really understood how to get someone and I'm just getting frustrated what with the world coming to an end.

Yesterday there was an EPIK DUST STORM, and although it didn't really make me think of planet Earth's impending doom, I am thinking of that now. Sometimes it feels like I'm ... how do I say it--Oh like Zoidberg, from Futurama. Everyone else from his generation were coupling up to reproduce and die, and he is fighting Fry so he doesn't get the chance to find his mate, and ends up the only adult lobster alien thing left.

Okay, so my situation isn't as serious, and there will be other opportunities in my life to have sex with lobsters, but is it my fault for wanting it now?

cruisinnnnnnnnnnngggggggg

Ever since my friends have been becoming of age and getting their P's there has been an increased pressure to sneak out and drive around, otherwise known as "cruising, bro". I must say that ever since Mylinh got her P's that I've seen her more often and I've been reminded why she's so awesome.

I am, however, sorry that I am really slack and don't have my L's so Mylo has to drop me home and pick me up, and I can feel myself get tired in the car on the way home, so my small way of making it up to her is usually to stay up until she gets home. Then that way I will feel like I'm making a difference when I'm really not--kinda like doing forty hour famine, without donating money, because essentially you're foregoing food for the sake of foregoing food, but there's a placebo effect in that you still think you're doing something.

On Friday night we went to Sunnybank, met up with Phuong and Anthony, drove up to Mt Cootha, screamed at ghosts, probably surpassed the speed limit, made Phuong cry out of fear of the fog atop Mt Cootha, and then made our way back to Maccas in Sunnybank at around 2 in the morning only to find out that they don't serve ice cream after 1, and then start serving it again until 4, which, at the time, was the most heartbreaking thing I had ever encountered.

So we decided to loiter for a bit, until one of Phuong's drug dealer acquaintances (I say one because she might have more. NO JUDGEMENT) came in high and offered us some drugs. It was nice of him and all, as he had only known us for five minutes, but yeah we declined and left to go home, after an hour (I think? I have a bad sense of time) of talking.

I think the best part about cruising is when Mylo has to drive me home and we're tired and we talk and it's nice because I think it makes us connect deeper than earlier in the evening. Is it weird that we're closer when we're tired? Whatever, it is usually the best part of the night.

So on Saturday I had planned to study, but my dad had a massive spack so I decided to call upon Jermia to pick me up and waste time together. I know this makes me a pussy and shit for using her, BUT ... I'm a pussy and shit so whatever lol. Just want to say--thanks, Jermia for yeah ... you know ... your brown nipples.

Tomorrow is the start of blocks and I'm not really prepared but what is new. My mum is slowly learning how to use the internet and she just showed me some samoan blog, and I read some of the articles and lol I just find it funny that my mum is using the computer because she is old.

Lol and I started playing Oblivion on X-box 360, some role-playing alternate universe with magic blah, etc game, and I joined "the dark brotherhood" by killing an innocent lady in her own house so I could steal her axe. Then I killed the Brotherhood's fucking pet rat in a dungeon then I got kicked out, and they sent a ghost to try and kill me. WTF? double standards, much? In my defence, I didn't know it was the house pet.

Unintentionally Racist

So lately I've been thinking about whether or not you can consider something to be a racist occurrence if the people involved just don't know any better. I'm going to start out by saying something that should be obvious and that is that I don't like racism. If you're a decent human being you'd think the same, but recently I've come across a few people who seem to think it's okay to not know that what they're doing rubs me, and others, the wrong way--that way being, namely, racist.
Yes, I'm being rubbed racist-ly.

I guess I wouldn't care unless a few things that happened in the past two weeks hadn't occurred or maybe I'm just trying to play victim because I'm a sook. Either way I'm still going to write about it.

I remember catching a peak hour train from Central Station after school, and usually you can just hold up your ticket and the station operators barely look at it and they just let you through, but there I was in all my law-breaking blackness with my ticket intending to walk through like the 50-odd swarm of people that had just done so around me to be stopped and asked for my ID and so the guy could scrutinize my ticket. I didn't think of it but then this white guy came up to me and said, "that's fucking bullshit they didn't even check my ticket because I'm white. That's bloody racist" OWTTE (which Sandra tells me means, "Or words to that effect"). That made me think well yeah that was pretty racist but I'm not dying so I'll get over it.

My school uniform is pretty effed up in that no public transport workers ever think I am really a high school student. I was getting on my bus to go home, and I showed the bus driver my school ID to which he said, "I don't know this school *longest pause in the world*", to which I said,
"… it has the Queensland transport logo on it…"
"… That doesn't mean a thing!"
So he made me pay the adult fare.
I swear some bus-drivers are just small human beings who like to feel big by abusing all the power their jobs offer them.
He didn't even ask for the school IDs of other high school-aged kids, and it might just be because I look old for my age, but then again, they were all white. Some of them weren't even in uniform though. T_T I like to think I don't jump to conclusions, but was he honestly suggesting that I had made a fake school ID card, worn some fugly cheap business man uniform just to get a cheaper fare on my bus home. If I had the ability to invest that much effort in anything I would definitely not be as penniless as I am. I guess that's not really racist as much as it shows that the bus driver was the equivalent of a Pompei-sized douchebag erupting. It's still annoying though.

A teacher from school saw me wearing shorts on some extra-curricular school activity and noted how my knees looked, "dirty". They then said that it was as if I "don't scrub", and "need to wash [my] knees". I was silently astounded. There was no way that I thought a teacher would say something so blatantly uneducated. It's not like coloured people are rare in the world. I felt like I had stepped into a time warp and was remembering stories my primary teachers would tell me about there not being mixed swimming pools in case the colour ran off the indigenous Australians. More than anything, I was annoyed that such ignorance was able to prevail even until this day and age. My dark skins folds when my knee is not bent which makes it look darker or ''dirty'' as one might suggest, but honestly who would even say something like that. It's not like people go around saying, "you look like you need to wash", to strangers without causing offence. Even though the teacher probably isn't racist, I felt like that was a stupid thing to say considering my skin colour.

Something else that annoys me, but that I'm sometimes guilty of, is mistaking peoples' identites. A lady at the daycare where I went to drop my nephew off told me he couldn't come in because they have a rule not allowing children with fevers to return for at least a day. I asked if she was sure and she told me that my nephew had a fever of 40 degrees and that my house had been called to collect him yesterday. I told her that there was some mistake and that it wasn't him, because he wasn't even there the previous day. Then she told me to wait, that I was probably wrong and then she left to fuck around for ten minutes/check.
How and, more importantly, why did she think that she was correct? I wouldn't have minded had she not approached me with a face that was more "what the hell do you think you're doing?" than "sorry, we're just upholding company policy."
T_T WTF? If you hadn't mistaken every brown kid in your class for one another this type of embarrassing mix-up wouldn't happen. That is why mistaken identity annoys me, and I'm not entirely certain whether it's racist or not. I always used to say that racism is only when you do something like say, "this person sucks because they r x race" as opposed to "this x race person sucks", but I realize that there's so much more to it than that.

 

I know I'm overreacting but these daily annoyances are starting to get to me, and sometimes I feel like being unintentionally racist back, but even then I would feel like I know what I'm doing. So why doesn't everyone else?